^+^ SMALL STRAWS IN A SOFT WIND by Marsha Burns -- Sept. 23, 2010 ^+^

Those things that you have ignored that have been out of order or needed to be fixed are up for review again. You can no longer ignore the things that need to be dealt with either spiritually or naturally; they will not go away or get right without your participation or without your faith and action. You will be presented with prime opportunities to take responsibility that will make a way for you to leave the past behind and have a new start, says the Lord. Don't turn a blind eye.

*My Sensitivity*

I spoke to a previous boyfriend.  We discussed, argued, agreed and disagreed and in the midst of it all, he expressed that we could never work because I am “too sensitive” thus making me immature & insecure and he needs an older, mature woman who can handle his indiscretion…  Being who and how I am… I appreciated, evaluated & have been pondering on said statement since we’ve had this conversation…. and here goes…

 

Indeed, I am an emotionally sensitive person.  I experience emotions extraordinarily intense… my emotional sensitivity is not a matter of feeling more than others, rather, it is a different way of experiencing the world: vivid, captivating, penetrating, encompassing, multifaceted, commanding...

 

Possessing the capacity to feel, experience and express that which he subconsciously suppressed = Failed Relationship on MY part???  Hmmm, let’s dig some more shall we??.

 

Establishing intimacy with anyone, especially your partner, requires some level of emotional participation.  I recognize that some (especially men) view emotional participation as burdensome…a liability…vulnerability  ::insert phrase with negative connotation here:: but are you genuinely suited to be in a relationship if your perception of emotional awareness & connection is comatose?  A healthy relationship, like a healthy meal, is best when balanced and palatable for and by both partners.  When either partner lacks the ability or desire to *feed* the relationship to a point where one partner has to overcompensate ---> you can bet your bottom dollar that someone or both will become unhappy… But that’s a no-brainer, Right??!    Right!! 

 

[Disclaimer: he is not here to defend himself therefore I’ll keep the accusations to a minimum – two sides to every story]  Being the person that he is, ::side eye:: {emotionally unavailable} some things in life, such as love and relationships and all that comes with it, are black and white – no gray areas… either it is or it ain’t!! I don’t think he realizes that some things/emotions/actions/reactions can coexist…

For instance:  It is possible for someone who is sensitive to be with someone who is not sensitive.  I am sensitive to certain situations, subjects and issues yet my actions and/or reactions to said matters are always… well, majority of the time, enriching and positive. I handle myself in such a manner that my emotions and expression elevate, as oppose to hinder, me.

 

My stance is that emotional immaturity is being insensitive to sensitive issues...emotional immaturity signifies negligence and inability to interpret, understand and productively express emotions.  I wonder if he understands that being an emotionally sensitive person is not a requirement in handling sensitive issues?  I feel like he believes (as many people do) that 1 cannot exist without the other…  I love analogies so let me analogize...

 

-->  If I occasionally go out with friends and have drinks, does that make me an alcoholic?  <-- The answer is NO… One can and often does exist without the other… I can go out and have drinks and not be or become an alcoholic.  It is possible to be with a sensitive person and not be or become a sensitive person… In fact, I think it’s a balancing act that’s quite beneficial =]

 

Sweetheart… I am sensitive but I am not emotionally immature or insecure… The DIFFERENCE is in the Execution… 

 

with love,

 

sHERaya

*In My World*

In My World - I post love-notes to Myself from Me on my calendar at work… ::smirk:: 

 

In My World – I have my daughter look in the mirror & say “I Love You” to herself!  (She sometimes think I’m Nuts! lol!) ::smirk::

 

In My World – I write love-notes w/ lipstick on my bathroom mirror in the morning… Sometimes in different languages [there’s an app for that]… Just 2 see me smile when I get home! ::smirk::

 

In My World – I write love-notes on my daughter’s bathroom mirror in the morning just to see her reaction when she gets home!

 

In My World …